Tourism of the Mind X : Book 01 prelim cover

Submitted by Karen on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 04:20

I was working on this intensely yesterday and sharing with two near and dear readers. Why just them!?? Here you go! Comments and suggestions welcome. Is it a selling cover? Would it intrigue you? Final except unless someone has some serious legitimate objection, or I fuss more with it (likely).

Another version based on comments:

The fix here was to make little Chevenga look less cavemannish, based on my and other people's guesses as to what that means. I don't think I agree that it's too busy.

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Comments

Hopefully Not Too Harsh

Submitted by G. Veravenga on Sat, 04/21/2012 - 12:45.

There's something too square about the young Chevenga. It's vaguely caveman-ish.

I also agree that there's too much going on. If you're going to focus on the young, emotional boy, just do that. If you're going to focus on the mysterious double image of death, then focus on that. Putting the two together doesn't form one coherent hook that makes you wonder what happened.

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Not so much harsh as

Submitted by Karen on Mon, 04/23/2012 - 12:24.

...you're a bit late to the party. I can still make changes but my mind is really on the next one.

I am not sure what you mean by cave-mannish. His forehead?

Re too much going on, I want to see whether others agree before I make any changes. You can't please everybody.

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If anything, I would guess

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 05/02/2012 - 15:18.

If anything, I would guess it's the cheeks, more than his forehead. Children tend to have somewhat rounder faces. This model is recognizably Chevenga, though, so you probably won't want to make any major changes to him.

I rather like how you've got the flames from the landscape fading up into a funeral bier. This is a good way to combine the two images. One thing that may be contributing to the impression of 'too much going on' is that the foreground and background figures are similar in scale, which places them on the same 'plane' and almost makes it look as though Tennunga's corpse is floating behind little Chevenga.

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Ack. Forgot to sign my

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 05/02/2012 - 15:20.

Ack. Forgot to sign my comment again. I should go make an account so I don't have to do that anymore...

~Meeks~

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Yes and also because to be a patron

Submitted by Karen on Wed, 05/02/2012 - 15:33.

...you have to have an account.

Thanks for the comment! I think you posted it at about the same time I posted the fix.

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I would not add people in

Submitted by capriox on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 08:01.

I would not add people in front of the burning house. It's plenty busy and dramatic as it is, I don't think they would contribute any to it's impact and might take away due to clutter.

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The idea of that

Submitted by Karen on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 12:41.

...was in part to fill up that black dead space in the first version. I've solved that problem with type in the second, and putting anything like figures behind that type would be a big mistake.

Thanks for your feedback as ever, cap!